


The Many Kisses of Jim and Bones

by bluegeekEM



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Aliens Make Them Do It, Banter, Kid Fic, Kissing, M/M, Mission Fic, Schmoop
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-18
Updated: 2013-01-18
Packaged: 2017-11-26 00:12:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,467
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/644438
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bluegeekEM/pseuds/bluegeekEM
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Seven kisses Jim and Leonard had to perform in public and one that was private, and simply for themselves.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Many Kisses of Jim and Bones

**Author's Note:**

> Written for a prompt at the jim_and_bones community in 2010. I consider it a loosely-related semi-unintentional sequel to [Just Warming Up](http://archiveofourown.org/works/183615), a previous Kirk/McCoy kissing fic.

1

″She _what_?″ Leonard didn't think Jim could sound more horrified if he tried, though perhaps he could amp up the arm-waving a bit.

Spock was unperturbed by the display. ″Ensign Je'enay from Protocol has informed me that the High Priestess' youngest daughter has been questioning him regarding human courting and mating customs, specifically those pertinent to you. I thought it best that you be informed.″ 

″I- she- what the hell?″ Jim looked about ready to scream. Or break something. Either would likely do. Leonard couldn't really blame him, considering. This was the third time this year that an Important Family Member of their mission's First Contact Chief Negotiator decided that he or she was desperately in love with Jim and that no other would do. ″Why does this keep happening to me?″ Jim growled, and not in the sexy way.

″You're just too damn pretty, Jim.″ Leonard couldn't keep the shit-eating grin off his face.

″Glad to see you're not threatened by these situations,″ Jim said sarcastically.

″'Course I'm not threatened, Jim.″ Leonard grabbed Jim by the shoulders and pulled him closer. ″I know you're mine.″ Jim's shoulders sagged slightly under Leonard's touch, abandonment of his anger or relief, Leonard wasn't sure. ″Let's show the rest of them, okay?″

Jim rolled his eyes but angled in towards Leonard. ″I wish we didn't have to constantly announce ourselves to near strangers.″

″So long as they aren't trying to shoot us or serve us for dinner if we don't, I can't say I really mind.″ Leonard grinned and leaned in towards Jim, capturing his mouth in a soft, lingering kiss.

~~~

2

It was kinda sweet, actually, in a weird, coercive alien ceremony sort of way. If you ignored the armed guards surrounding them and the blast shielding preventing an emergency beam-out, the hall was really quite appropriately festive with the brightly colored tapestries, fragrant flower arrangements, and jubilant onlookers.

That they were locked in while awaiting their Undujulan wedding - because Jim had made the mistake of reaching for Leonard when the doctor had tripped over a loose cobblestone in the street, thereby publicly breaking the planet's strict taboo regarding contact between unmated individuals - didn't detract from the charm of their surroundings. Much. 

So they exchanged clan symbols – really their Starfleet insignia pins – and burned pleasant-smelling incense, and were pronounced mated for evermore, the act to be sealed with sharing of the sacred wines. They each drank from their respective goblets – both Ensign Je'enay and Christine Chapel had reassured them that the contents were safe for human ingestion – and pressed their lips together, sharing the tartness of the drink between them as the Chieftain smiled down at them and signaled the guards to holster their weapons.

~~~

3

Joanna had grown several inches that year, and she used every single bit of that new height to her advantage as she decorated the rec room with mistletoe. It hung from every joint and grate, and even some bare areas of the room she'd apparently decided were too dull to remain unadorned. Leonard and Jim could barely move more than a few steps without having to stop for the traditional kiss under a dangling sprig. To be fair, no one else could either, though, so at least they weren't singled out this time.

Leonard wanted to remind Jim that it was _his_ fault she'd taken up that particular decorative habit, but his lips were far too busy with other... pursuits, to bother.

~~~

4

The people of Benefice III were sweet and generous, and very willing to host the landing party in decadent comfort for several days while they negotiated treaties with the Federation.

They also apparently worshiped a goddess-figure known for her brilliantly blue eyes, so the sight Jim and Ensign Je'enay in all their blue-eyed glory caused quite a stir. Pleasantly, it wasn't the sort of stir that ended in phaser fire and internal injuries but rather in showers of rose petals and a grand feast in their honor.

Though the friendliness and celebratory nature of the Beneficians was clearly making the security team twitchy, Jim was enjoying himself immensely. His contentment wasn't affected at all when he was informed by their hosts that his sky-colored eyes were a sign of a great honor and duty bestowed upon him by the Great Mother and that to show appreciation for such a gift he must share his blessings amongst his fellows, he didn't hesitate to pull Leonard into a tight embrace and kiss him nearly senseless. 

The unprecedentedly bountiful harvest that year was joyfully attributed to Jim and the ensign.

~~~

5

Leonard knew he was needed on the ship. There were several injuries that required close attention and he couldn't risk straying far from Sickbay for long, no matter much he desperately wanted to climb up next to Jim on that transporter pad. And if _he_ was willing to beam hither and yon just to stay at Jim's side, he _knew_ the situation must suck rotten, smelly eggs.

Jim, heavily armed and wearing blast-protection gear that didn't have a prayer of protecting him from the types of weapons the enemy was said to be sporting, stood quietly at the foot of the transporter deck surveying the rest of his team, ensuring that everyone was as prepared as possible. Knowing Jim, he was likely looking each man and woman of his team in the eye and acknowledging that though he was sending them into a deadly situation, he wasn't sending them alone.

If Jim could look them all in the eye while knowing that he was possibly – probably - sending them to their deaths, then Leonard could work up the courage to impress upon Jim just how much he expected to see him beam back to the _Enterprise_ safe and sound when the mission was over, despite their audience.

As Jim performed one last check of his equipment and and the supplies on his utility belt, Leonard walked up behind him, turned him around, and pulled him by the neck into a lingering kiss. He nipped at Jim's lips, softly swept his tongue over the minor hurts, and cupped the back of Jim's head in his hands. The others in the room remained respectfully silent, diverting their gazes elsewhere.

When Leonard stepped back he noted that Jim's lips were reddened and remained slightly parted, sending a thrill piercing through his chest. They maintained eye contact even as Jim gave the order to transport and right up until he dissolved into beams of light before Leonard's eyes.

~~~

6

″What sort of weird-ass alien ritual is that?″ Jim eyed the object currently being offered to Bones, standing a few feet away. Jim could see Bones raise his eyebrows and question the elderly woman who held it out to him.

″It's not alien, Captain. The offering of a cloved orange is actually a ritual originating on Earth and practiced within a certain cultural group a couple hundred years ago.″ Uhura's voice was sweet and clearly amused as she noted the subject of Jim's scrutiny. ″I'm not sure where exactly the Ubaxians learned of the tradition, or what they are using in place of the orange, which doesn't grow on this planet, but Ensign Je'enay states that it is our host's attempt to be culturally conscious.″

″Well isn't that,″ Jim paused, searching for an appropriate word and watching as Bones smiled at the woman and took the fruit from her outstretched hand. ″Thoughtful.″ To Jim's surprise, after removing one of the cloves from the flesh of the ″orange,″ Bones took the woman's hand and raised it to his lips, pressing a kiss to its back and then to her cheek. She mirrored him with a laugh and a light swat to his arm before shooing him away, cloved fruit in hand.

Jim turned to Uhura. ″What is the significance of the tradition?″

″Amusement, primarily,″ she responded. ″And a way to meet new people and catch up with friends and old acquaintances. You offer them the cloved orange and they have the option of accepting it or refusing it. If they accept, the custom is to then remove a clove from the fruit and offer a kiss in return. The placement or nature of the kiss can differ depending on one's familiarity, or desire for familiarity, with the offerer.″

Before he could question her further, Jim was interrupted by a tap to the shoulder. He turned to find Bones smiling slyly at him and holding up the orange fruit that was still liberally studded with cloves. When Jim stared at him in surprise – Bones was not known for his eagerness to take part in unfamiliar displays – he merely raised an eyebrow. 

At that, Jim smiled and accepted the offering, taking his time in selecting the clove to remove. Task done, he reached out to grab Bones by the collar and pull them together. ″Uhura says that the nature and placement of the kiss reveals how well the receiver would like to get to know the offerer.″

″Is that so?″ 

″It is.″ Jim wrapped an arm around Bones' shoulder and yanked him into a long kiss, full on the lips. With tongue.

~~~

7

″Seriously?″ Jim didn't bother to contain his disbelief.

″Yes sir.″ Ensign Je'enay regarded his commanding officer solemnly.

″And Starfleet Command didn't see fit to inform us of this little detail?″ Jim wasn't sure why he was surprised by this sort of thing at this point, because, really, it was like every third mission that some important detail was left out of the mission briefings. He supposed that was par for the course considering their prime mission directive was exploration, but _honestly_.

″There is nothing in the files, either diplomatic or military, that would suggest they had yet discovered this information, sir. Thus far you are the only Federation representative to have any success in coming to a treaty agreement with them, and therefore enable us to discover this aspect of their culture.″

″Great. Just great. So to recap what we've learned here, you're telling me that the G-people-″

″Grt'plaxians, sir.″

″Yes, them. Anyways, they are apparently impressed by my amazing schmoozing abilities and willing to make a formal declaration with the Federation.″

″Yes, Captain.″

″But in order for the declaration to be viewed as legitimate by their laws and standards it must be properly 'sealed.'″

″Yes, sir.″

″And according to Lieutenant Uhura's translation of their protocols, they seal important deals by _kissing_?″

″Yes, sir. Well, by something approximating kissing, since they are not humanoid life-forms and do not have the same-″

″Yes, yes, yes. But it amounts to kissing, correct?″

″Yes, sir. Historically, it would appear that a representative from each party forming a treaty or bond will make contact with the communication orifice of the other as a symbol of trust that they are each speaking truths when entering into the agreement. They do so publicly so as to have multiple witnesses to the contract.″ Ensign Je'enay's eyes were practically twinkling, and Jim told himself that it was just a quirk of the man's biology and not because he was laughing at Jim's predicament. They hadn't even gotten to the funny part yet. 

Jim sighed. ″And Doctor McCoy has determined that one of the compounds in the slime that lubricates and moisturizes their skin is toxic to humans?″

″Unfortunately, sir. It is a substance that is secreted throughout their dermal layer and coats all exposed surfaces on their body, so it is not possible to avoid contact with the substance. It is suspected to cause such effects as pain, boils, sloughing skin-″

″That's okay, Ensign. I get the picture.″ Jim shook his head. He'd thought the two solid weeks of painstaking negotiations had been bad enough. Apparently he was wrong. 

Both men looked up as Lieutenant Uhura joined them in their alcove to the side of the meeting hall. Jim nodded to her before continuing. ″So what are our options? And please note that anything involving boils and sloughing skin is not to be considered an option.″

Uhura responded promptly. ″While they insist that the ceremony must be carried out for the treaty to be legal, in these unusual circumstances the Grt'plaxians are willing to elect a representative from the crew to act as their stand-in for the sealing ceremony so as not to endanger your life.″

Jim's jaw dropped. ″Oh. I was... actually I was expecting something much worse. A representative? I think we can manage that.″

″Yes, Captain, I will tell their negotiator that we accept their terms. I also have an update on their selection for representative.″

″And who have they decided I should lock lips with, Lieutenant?″ Jim shot her a suggestive grin.

″Dream on, Captain.″ Uhura was smiling despite her sharp words. ″It would appear that they were very impressed by Commander Spock and Doctor McCoy during the scientific and medical exchange sessions, and-″

″Oh for the love of the _Enterprise_ , please tell me they haven't picked _Spock_!″

Uhura rolled her eyes, and really, she was the only one he let get away with that sort of thing on duty. ″No sir, they've chosen Doctor McCoy.″

Jim paused, thinking for a moment, and noted a distinct lack of yelling and raving from Bones' direction. ″And has Doctor McCoy been informed of his, um, elevation in position?″

″Not yet, sir.″ Uhura smiled again. ″Would you like to do the honors?″

″Oh yes. I definitely would. Carry on, Lieutenant, Ensign. And Uhura? If Bones makes too much of a fuss, tell the G-people it's because he's so honored to have been selected.″

″Absolutely, Captain. Enjoy the ceremony.″

~~~

Bonus 

Leonard felt Jim's fingertips skim softly across the skin of his back, sending a shiver throughout his body at the feather-light sensation. Leonard huffed out a breath and arched his back. ″Give a man a little time, Jim. Some of us have a pesky thing called a 'refractory period' to deal with.″

Jim leaned further over him and pressed a kiss to Leonard's temple, then rested his forehead against the spot that still held a faint echo of his lips. They remained there for several long breaths, and Leonard could feel the light brush of Jim's eyelashes flutter against his skin. 

″That's okay, Bones. We've got all the time in the world right now.″ Jim maneuvered himself to the side and curled himself against Leonard's long frame 

″Oh really?″

″Yeah.″ Jim smiled, wide and unreserved. ″We are not moving from this bed, except for the absolute necessities of hygiene and food, for the next three weeks.″

″Is that so?″

″It is. Any objections?″ Jim lay his head down on Leonard's pillow, those bright eyes and smiling mouth mere inches away.

″Not one.″ Leonard crossed the short distance between them and pressed his lips to Jim's.


End file.
